NO STARS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rated PG-13 for intense battle sequences.
127 Minutes
Written By: Doug Taylor and Jason Rappaport
Directed By: Uwe Boll
I will have my vengeance. -Farmer
Synopsis
An evil medieval magician/warlord uses magic to seduce a rival sorcerers daughter, steal her powers and run an army of drone killers to take over the land, yet there is one who would stop him from achieving his goal. A mere farmer, who seems much more, desires to avenge the death of his son, and save his wife who has been taken prisoner. Everything is mystical and full of illusions.
Review
How does Uwe manage to get a decent cast list when he makes movies that qualify Sci-Fi originals as Oscar worthy in comparison? Beyond the cast, what I have been subject to has been a frightening display of inept unoriginal thinking and execution. In The Name Of The King is the crown jewel of his film failures and should be red taped at every video store it’s available at.
There were no high expectations here either. Just an innocent curiosity about Jason Statums new adventure flick that’s supporting cast offered the possibility of something bigger than those Sci-Fi Originals though obviously I wasn’t hoping for Lord Of The Rings. Sure, mindless adventure with battles and over the top love heroics were something forecast, but the result was a film shot in an almost hazy fashion with sloppy battle sequences that even the action hero Jason Statam couldn’t overcome. The script itself felt lazy and bored. It was as though the writers were too busy playing X-box to write anything original at all. The pathetic story they put together was stolen ideas from video games and movies already created alike, and it’s visual creation less exciting than soggy oatmeal.
It was truly an atrocity, with drone villains, and the heroes, in particular the history of “Farmer” simply ludicrous. It was exasperating to sit through, but somehow I managed my way threw it’s entirety. I suspect it was the masochist in me, but I felt I needed to know exactly how this stupid and annoying tale finished itself. And after the sacrifice of nearly every main character, the ending just left me wanting more massacre, in the hopes that every character would die so there would be no possibility for a sequel.
Cast
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Jason Statam as Farmer
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Ray Liotta as Gallian
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Claire Forlani as Solana
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John Rhyes-Davies as Merik
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Matthew Lillard as Duke Fallow
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LeeLee Sobieski as Muriella
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Burt Reynolds as King Konreid
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Ron Perlman as Norick
Jason Statam is a decent actor, but his abilities were far too limited to rise above the quality of film and script involved. Even Burt Reynolds and John Ryes-Davies came off looking like morons. The only character that seemed to fall comfortably into the story was Ron Perlmans, and his role was too small to have contributed anything in the long run. Ray Liotta was the absolute worst though. He incorporated everything that was wrong about the movie as he portrayed an evil sorcerer that managed to come off as more of a Gangster gone Child molester. His character was creepy in all the wrong ways and made the story that much more laughable until you come to realize that Matthew Lillard is actually playing a power hungry villain, and then suddenly you begin to ask yourself why exactly you’re still watching and if you’ve misread the label as parody? Well, it’s not and other than some twisted desire to finish the nightmare of a film, there is truly no reason to watch it. There is also no redemption for the actors who chose to be a part of this twisted story, as the script was obviously a complete disaster. They all deserve the fate of being part of one of the worst movies ever.
Ratings and Suggestions
I don’t know what it’s rated, but the only suggestion I have for this terrible flick is to STAY AWAY, STAY FAR AWAY! This is time you can never get back, but the most unfortunate aspect of the movie is it doesn’t leave you after you’re done viewing. You can’t seem to get it’s utter stupidity out of your mind. This movie is easily a candidate for worst movie of the year and possibly all time. Don’t watch it ever. I promise you won’t be sorry. No stars for In The Name Of The King: A Dungeon Tale and shame on you Uwe Boll for making it.
This movie was a piece of doo-doo. Jason Statum is so way hot tho.