Rated PG-13 for some sexual and crude content, and language,including a drug reference.
99 Minutes

Directed By: Tom Vaughan
Written By: Dana Fox
Staring: Cameron Diaz, Ashton Kutcher, Bob Coddry, Lake Bell, Jason Sudeikis, Treat Williams, Dennis Farina and Dennis Miller

Is there any part of the night, I don’t know, maybe say the part where I was about to marry the rebound guy, that you thought, ‘hey oh my God, this is a really good time for an intervention’? -Joy

Review

With all the exciting buzz over Las Vegas in the recent years and the common advertisement of  “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas” it was inevitable a film incorporating this idea was going to get made.  This movie equivalent of what can happen on a drunken night in Vegas started out with some promise, but unfortunately took a catastrophic turn for ridiculous situations, circumstances, and some of the most annoying behaviors of character’s I’ve seen in a long time.

Our two main character’s Jack and Joy each take a friend to Vegas to escape from their woes in New York City.  Joy, a control freak who has recently been dumped by her fiance is trying to embrace spontaneity; while Jack, an underachiever has just been fired by his own father, is continuing to avoid confronting his problems.  The two connect over gregarious amounts of alcohol and at some point in the evening tie the knot officially.  The two agree the next day to sever ties and move on, when only seconds later Joy’s quarter wins Jack a three million dollar jack pot in the slot machines.  When they litigate, the judge is appalled by the lack of sanctity of marriage and freezes the money ordering the two to live together and go to marriage counseling for six months before he will divide the money and grant their divorce.  They move in together, realizing they are polar opposites and begin a siege of trying to make the other as miserable as possible.

For the first twenty minutes I was confused why the movie had gotten such bad reviews.  The situations of each of the main characters was plausible, and the entire debacle with them drunk in Vegas was comical, and an honest depiction of what can happen to people if thrown into the right situation with the correct amount of alcohol.  The way the entire drunken night in Vegas was shot embraced the comedy and the chaos of drunken bliss.  The movie is great until the couple hit the jack pot on a slot machine and return to New York.  From that point on the events and characters become obnoxious rather than funny.

Ashton Kutcher appeared to have researched his role by avoiding grooming or showering entirely.  The fact that he was portraying an immature underachiever is no excuse to be physically revolting.  Especially when he is paired with Cameron Diaz who looked the best she has in years.  She only appeared moderately anorexic, was sporting an inviting tan while her hair was blond bombshell gorgeous.  It was difficult to see her character giving Kutcher’s the time of day regardless of their chemistry or what relationship the script insinuated they were developing, because he was that repulsive.

Despite how awful the film was I can’t really blame any of the failure on either of the lead actors.  They played the parts that were written for them as well as could have been expected.  Though, they are responsible for choosing to play a role in such a tragic disaster of a script.  The dialogue was unexceptional, but the plot and how the entire situation panned out was insulting.  Between the director, Tom Vaughan, and the writer Dana Fox,  each was lucky that they had Diaz and Kutcher in the roles or it could have been even worse.

What Happens In Vegas dug it’s own grave.  From Kutcher appearing like he’d combed his hair with a pork chop, to the ridiculous sentence by Dennis Miller, this film fell to pieces.  Making such an outrageous ruling by the judge showed Dana Fox had complete lack of creativity or any sensibility.  If concepts like this get sold into Hollywood films, who knows what will be onscreen in the next few years.  This was a pretty awful one, but at least it was short.

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